Monday, January 26, 2009

Lil' Wayne Rocks Out With "Prom Queen"

The rumors are apparently true. Lil' Wayne, a.k.a. Weezy F. Baby, is releasing a rock album entitled Rebirth and the lead off single, "Prom Queen," has leaked on the internet. The album is slated for an April 7 release date but until then we have this clip of the firts single to tide us over (although I'm sure by Thursday the entire album will leak on the internet).

I am still undecided on how I feel about Lil' Wayne as a rocker. I do, however, have to say that I think Weezy's first cross over into the rock world is a better 'rock' performance than any of the rock artists who've covered Weezy songs so far...

Exhibit A: Fall Out Boy...err, sorry, not sure how I made the mistake...Framing Hanley's cover of "Lollipop"

Was the two minute introduction neccesary? To quote a good friend of mine about this video: "Intro = Sad attempt to Demonstrate Higher Value" and "it looks like an Old Metairie version of the Hills." 'Nuff said...

And then Jonathon Davis of Korn-fame emerges from somewhere with a cover of "Got Money." Weezy really might be taking over the world. I mean he brought Korn out from under whatever rock they've been hiding under for the past ten years.

I do wish they would have kept the "I need a Winn-Dixie grocery bag full of money..." line in the song though. That line sets the tone for the song. Not to mention that hearing Jonathon Davis' voice croon those lines would have been slightly amusing.

As long as Dashboard Confessional stays away from "Comfortable" we'll all be okay. But, seriously, what's next? Third Eye Blind covering "Mrs. Officer"......wait, that actually could be a pretty bad-ass cover...Funny how that song hasn't got old yet...

Sunday, January 25, 2009

More Mindless License Plates

I am obviously way too amused by the ACME License Plate Generator and decided to make a few more...

Things about "Your Mom" are always entertaining...that's what she said...wait...

Wait, what did she say?

*i wish i could have a drum roll go off in the background after that one...i couldn't pass on the bad "Alaska" pun...*

This one was just too easy...TWSS...yeah, I'm turning "thats what she said" into an, OMG...WTF...I hope your LOL'ing

Not only is Arkansas home to Wal-Mart headquarter's but also the highest number of Wal-Mart customer's per capita...

I almost made a Michigan plate that read "OWEN16" but picking on the Detrit Lions is like picking on the blind and I've already used that one, not that its stopped me before...TWSS... for some sad but serious commentary on the US auto industry...

...and you know I couldn't finish this blog entry without picking on the great state of Oklahoma...

which reminds me...

Why doesn't Texas fall into the Gulf of Mexico?

Because Oklahoma sucks so much...

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Whatever You Like Parody - (Obama - Whatever I Like)

After his first day in office, not only has President Barack Obama signed his first executive order to freeze Guantanamo Bay for 120 days, but he apparently also made a music video. He just wanted to let us know how he feels I guess?

And although its a pre-election clip I'm including this "Whatever You Like" spoof called "Vote However You Like" up for good measure because these 7th graders from the Ron Clark Academy are just too awesome to leave out of this post.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Change We Can Believe In Or Too Soon?

So, up until Obama was sworn in today it appeared to many that there was a dire need for CHANGE in our nation. The argument could be made that things in this country seemed eerily similar to the early 90's and that we were headed in the wrong direction (I won't even get into my opinion on this, because, well I have my convictions much as President George W. Bush does and I stand by them, but that's beside the point). Wherever you stand politically it is hard to deny the unpopular war in the middle east, a slowing economy, a President named George Bush. Well, now the United States of America has sworn in President Barack Obama and we now have our CHANGE...

But are things going to CHANGE that much?

During the Capitol luncheon Senator Ted Kennedy suffered a seizure and collapsed. Is this change? I mean we know how those Kennedy's are about being able to keep their heads together during major events...

...too soon?

...but seriously am I the only one wondering if he fell to the back and to the left?

...definitely too soon?

Seriously, though Sen. Kennedy probably just had a few too many scotches...wasn't this lunch held a little after noon? I am sure its not the first time Sen. Kennedy has hit the floor before 3:00 P.M.

According to George Stephanopoulos' account of the event:

Sen. Robert Byrd, D-W.Va., the oldest member of the Senate, was so upset and distraught from what he had witnessed, that he needed to be taken out of the room.

Wait, we're still talking about Kennedy's seizure, right? Or the inauguration in general? I mean we are talking about Sen. Byrd, here....'nuff said...if you don't get it look him up.

But back to the man of the hour, President Barack Obama and his inauguration speech. A Swedish website was taking bets on the likelihood of Obama using certain words during his election. The odds were 1000:1 that he would use the word 'banana'. WTF? Anyway, I am saddened to report that none of the following words made it into his speech: 'pace,' 'chili,' 'wipe his face,' etc...

I don't blame President Obama, though, I blame his head speech writer, John Favreau.

No, not that one...

That would have been so money though...

This, however, did happen and I only wish I would've placed some of the CHANGE I have left on someone breaking out with a freestyle during the ceremony.

Say, what? Oh, lawd...

I think my favorite thing about this whole inauguration was Washington D.C. enacting prostitution free zones for the day. Wait, shouldn't they all be prostitution free zones? Nevermind...I am left to ask myself how did these zones impact local businesses in the District. Well, you didn't hear it from me but I hear a certain Louisiana Senator *cough* was seen in a poorly created disguise eating at his favorite spot today...

I heard it was extra messy today and that he did in fact have to 'wipe his face.'

And then there was Beyonce singing the First Dance for the First Couple on this historical day. I couldn't help but think that she should've just called an audible and started singing " the left, to the left..."

And now for our moment of zen for the week. With all this talk of HOPE and optimism in the country I couldn't think of a more appropriate story to bring up than the story of United Flight 1549. Both engines are dead and you are barely off the ground flying above a densely populated urban area. It seems as if catastrophe has struck. But a skilled pilot was able to land the plane on the Hudson River and all 155 people aboard walked away with their lives and only minor injuries. This brush with near disaster seems to be the perfect backdrop for President Obama's message of HOPE and optimism. I am certain our 44th President would say that such an event serves as a means of showing that even when things seem dim we must have HOPE and to those who doubt he would say 'Yes, we can.'

I, however, can only think "Who was flying that plane? JFK Jr.?"

...too soon?

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Mrs. Officer Parody - Like a Retard (Dee Dee Dee)

I just can't get enough of Lil' Wayne's "Mrs. Officer" and this parody is amazing!

Thursday, January 15, 2009


Unless you have lived under a rock for the past year you have seen the iconic "HOPE" posters depicting Barack Obama's image in a red, white and blue collage. Well, a lot of people have been going to Obamicon.Me to generate posters with their own picture in the same style as the Shepard Fairey original. You have surely seen one of these as a friend of yours facebook profile pic. Well, I decided to make one with my own image and also created a few for well-known sports figures and rappers, as well. Enjoy!

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Second Week of '09

So Michael Irvin, Paris Hilton, CP3, Waldo Faldo, that guy who sang Summer of '69, a naughty teacher, a cougar in training and Pac-Man Jones walk into a bar...well, not really but that would be a heckuva a joke, wouldn't it?

But, seriously, there has been some crazy stuff going on in the news lately and The Blog Is Hot is there to offer some commentary...

Former Cowboy Michael Irvin says motorist threatened him with a gun

So, Michael Irvin was at a stoplight in Dallas when this happened:

“The passenger pulled out a semiautomatic and I knew what time it was,” Irvin said. “But he said ‘Oh, that’s Michael Irvin, with the Dallas Cowboys.’”

Despite being scared, Irvin said he tried to keep the conversation going.

“So we started talking about the Cowboys and everything,” he said. “Then they got back on the highway.”

Do you think at any point during their exchange Irvin uttered the words "How 'bout them Cowboys?"

He further went on to say this in the interview:

“I tell you what, I’m glad he was a Cowboy fan,” Irvin said.

Are you sure he was a Cowboys fan or was it fellow Dallas Cowboy alum (haha) Pac-Man, err Adam Jones?

Apparently, it wasn't Pac-Man, err Adam Jones since he appeared to be hangin' with his peeps at the time of the alleged incident (the Titans jersey was so he could be "incognito").

But, seriously what do you think the odds are that Michael Irvin was cracked out during this alleged incident? One piece of advice, Mr. Irvin, drugs are bad mmm'kay?

And now on to our favorite celebrity whose famous for well we still aren't sure exactly why she's famous but...You seriously can't make stuff like this up:

Paris Hilton website violated by Trojan-spreaders

Now, that sounds like a Lifestyle decision to me. But, seriously, do you think Matt Leinart got back with her over the weekend? I mean its not like he's practicing for the playoffs or anything. Although, that would mean she was violated by a washed-up Trojan. Sorry, that was just uncalled for...Oh, how I love triple entendres...

Wait, was that a picture of Paris climbing out of a giant bottle of Pepto? See, now that is an ACTUAL news story that would be worth reporting.

Now on to a new story about our beloved CP3 of the local New Orleans Hornets:

University of Missouri basketball player claims to be Chris Paul's cousin

Chris Paul denies any relation with the Mizzou baller. I personally don't see the resemblance and think it sounds like hes trying to increase his draft stock. With that said I am, however, still not convinced that CP3 isn't related to this guy...

Yes, that is Waldo Faldo of Family Matters fame and I do believe he is CP3's cousin. Real, cousin, not the street slang kind of cousin, cousin.

And in a shocking turn of events in the music industry:

Ryan Adams Is Quitting Music, Says Ryan Adams

According to a post on his blog (how self-important are you, Mr. Adams, oh, wait...):

"I am a punch-line and a footnote in what is worse to yell at someone besides 'Free-bird'. I mean, I lost."

In other news Ryan Adams was still performing music...chili-dog...

Can you match the "teacher has inappropriate relations with student" story to the right picture? It's pretty damn easy...

Primary school teacher facing jail for sending lewd texts to schoolboy after grooming him on World of Warcraft

Athletic Trainer Did More Than Tape Ankles, Apparently

The moral of the story is if you play Warcraft you will never have a chance with the Athletic Trainer...well, not that one at least...

This just in...Pac-Man, err Adam Jones appears to be emulating Lil' Wayne. He already has the dreads, knows how to "Make it Rain," has had gun charges levied against him and goes by multiple aliases and now this:

I never thought I would get to say this, but: "Pac-Man, you need to wipe your face!"

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

That's What Sarah Palin Said

No explanation necessary...

...or as they say across the pond, "...said the actress to the bishop!"

Monday, January 12, 2009

Pop Culture License Plates

I used that ACME License Maker today and its actually amazing the pop culture references you can make with some of these plates. I am sure someone's already made a few of these before, but until I am told otherwise I'll think I am slightly clever...

I am sure there is someone in California rolling around with this plate on the back of their car. Most likely on a VW Microbus.

Do you think the Colorado DMV would issue this one? I do, hopefully not to a car titled to a man named Kenny, though. That would just be wrong.

I couldn't resist the easy joke here...

If 50 Cent cared about something beyond his fat stacks he would get this plate.

Do you think your oxen would die if the expression went "I was trying to Toyota the river..."

I woke up this morning with...

If you don't get what song the above plate refers to please click here and be enlightened. (Sidenote: I had my first fake ID confiscated at a Pat Green concert in Helotes while Pat was performing this song...sad to have to overhear one of my favorite PG songs while talking to TABC...I guess I deserved it trying to pass a New Jersey ID in the Texas Hill Country...especially when it was someone else's homemade ID...someone else wth black hair and blue eyes...)

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Get Low Parody - (Gnome)

"She was three foot three, chin with the beard, I bet the whole club thought she looked weird..."

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Talk About Having to Wipe Your Face

Lil' Wayne is being sued by a Chicago woman for allegedly "making it rain" all over her face. For the full news story click the video below:

Disclaimer: This is a parody of a real news story. A story this good would never actually happen...well, maybe to me and F & M's or the Republic would probably be involved at some point.

Friday, January 9, 2009

Musings on the 2008 BCS National Championship Game

Many of you may know how I felt about this BCS National Championship game. I hate Oklahoma and this season that feeling only grew stronger. The Big 12's rule for determining who plays in the conference championship is jacked up and essentially screwed Texas. We all know how I feel about was settled on a nuetral field, but the Big 12 saw otherwise and OU got to play in the conference championship. Their system showed its flaws due to the clusterf&*k that was the Big 12 South this year and the Longhorns were the victim.

You guys also probably know my feelings about Tim Tebow. I have no ill feelings towards Florida and always support my SEC teams in bowl games, but this was a hard one because well I think Tebow's kind of a douche, which is why I will call this matchup between the Oklahomo Sooners and Tim Tebag the 2008 BCS National Championship presented by Kotex. Not Fedex. Period. Pun Intended.

Now on to a brief summary of the events I saw take place during this BCS game presented by Kotex.

Who annointed Tim Tebag Superman?

While watching this game I heard them refer to Tim Tebag as "Superman" on at least four occasions? The commentators were all over his junk, I felt like their bromance with him was even stronger than that between John Madden and Tony Romo. I was wondering what could it be that they saw in him and then I found this:

I guess that answers that question.

But, Superman, really? I mean do you think Tebag sings "Superman dat hooooo?" or "Tebag dat hooooo?"...I wonder what his pastor would think about that?

How about crankin' that "Tebag that Teboooooow?"

Been done, already, apparently...

As if the Superman references weren't enough then I actually heard this gem come from a commentator's mouth...

"Tebow is the greatest leader in college football."

Hmm... but then it got worse...

"If you ever meet Tim Tebow your life will be better for it."

HONESTLY? Isn't there something in the Bible about false idols? Seriously, can he walk on water too? Sounds like this Tebag can give Walker, Texas Ranger a run for his money. Didn't he throw two interceptions in this game and didn't Colt McCoy have the highest completion percentage in NCAA history? Oh, well...

Then during halftime I was tortured by having to watch the finalists for the Pontiac gamechanging performance of the year. Not only did I have to watch that damn Crabtree TD against the Longhorns again but then I had to watch the Arkansas fans with their L-S-Who signs. L-S-Who actually wins championships....that's who.

The Tebag lovefest only continued at teh end of the game when he was penalized for doing the gator chump at an OU player. The commentators went on to say this is the first thing that Tebow has ever done wrong in his life. Honestly, guy?

And now onto Oklahoma...

I was highly amused when they attempted to demonstrate the fast no huddle offense of OU by showing a "Next Snap Countdown Clock" on the bottom left hand side of the screen. All I could think is 13 seconds til the next snap and OU still sucks.

And then when the officiating crew whistled the play dead before the snap to reset the clock I couldn't help but thinking they were messing with OU and that my Longhorn friends were thinking...

The game ended with Florida beating OU 24-14 and I began wondering where that "Crying OU Boy" was...Apparently he has an older sister in the band...

Can we just ban OU and Ohio State from BCS games? Three strikes and your out kinda thing? Oh, well I won't stop thinking that Texas should have had a shot at Florida in this game and that Colt McCoy is a far harder QB than Tebag. However, if there is one thing for certain that I can definately say from watching this game its that OU's cheerleaders win out over Florida's...

I guess, as they say, All is well that ends well.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

It's Thursday and OU Still Sucks

With Oklahoma playing in the National Championship game tonight I decided to give you guys a little photographic tour of my feelings about Oklahoma. As many of you may know I bleed purple and gold but I am also a Texas fan so its pretty obvious that my two least favorite teams would be Alabama and OU. I don't think I need to beat up on Alabama right now since a team from a non-real conference (Nick Satan's words, not mine), Utah, already did that for me, but, I digress...

Back to the point a hand...Seriously, OU, you guys had the same record as Texas and lost to the Longhorns on a nuetral field you and get invited to the BCS title game? Good luck with all that since we all know what they say about Bob Stoops. He's kinda like weed...he often gets smoked in bowls...So, for your viewing pleasure a few "inspirational" Oklahoma posters...

Of course, the infamous "Crying OU Boy" is gonna be the first picture on here...I wonder if this kid grew up any since then or if he cried again after the 45-35 loss to Texas this year....either way, lets hope we can find this kid again after an SEC team wins a third straight national championship tonight...

One word: Futility

...and another: Ownage

It's Beer Thirty and OU still sucks...

You can't spell "cocksucker" or "douchebag" wthout "OU"

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Rockstar Parody - (Pop Star)

So, we've all heard Nickelback's "Rockstar" about a few million times by now. And I also know how most people feel about Nickelback, but I have to admit I do love this song. I'm a sucker for songs like this, no homo, so when I found this parody I was highly entertained. The "Popstar" parody is even more amusing in light of Britney's comeback (I'll refrain from a raunchy, gratuitous Superman reference for the time being).

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

She Licked Me Like A Lollipop

2008: The Year of The Lollipop?

Ok, well, maybe not, but Lil' Wayne's smash hit single "Lollipop" was everywhere in '08. I'd go as far as saying it was the biggest single of the year, but you can say "Whatever You Like." This made me think about where exactly did the term "Lollipop" come from. Well when I decided to research the origins of ther term "Lollipop" I chose to consult with my favorite linguist, Marina Orlova.

Who knew?

For more linguistic lessons visit Marina Orlova's website, HotForWords.

Notice how I found a way to tie Lil' Wayne to Marina Orlova? Haha, once again it all comes full-circle.

Geaux Tigers!!!

Of course, I make one of my New Year's Resolution to update my blog frequently and then my laptop dies. Oh, well, what can I do? So, in celebration of LSU's victory over Georgia Tech in the Peach Bowl (yeah, i know, but it'll always be the Peach Bowl to me) I am posting a few videos to cap off the 2008 LSU football season.

It isn't from this season but it doesn't get old: Alley Broussard (a.k.a. Alley Cat) made this song called "LSU Boys" a few years back...

And now for a country song about an LSU girl that I hear every single time I drive through Lafayette. Here is a clip of Hammond, La's Todd O'Neill singing Cajun Queen:

...and last but not least, you knew it was coming...a clip that brings back such good memories of the 2007 National Championship LSU Tigers team....a clip from the pre-game Better Than Ezra show complete with LSU cheerleaders and Mike The Tiger...

...coincidently, who did LSU beat in that game? I guess the hat beat the sweatervest. And last night the mighty Buckeyes fell once again in a BCS game to the gunslinging of Texas' Colt McCoy (best quarterback name EVER, by the way), but more on that later...